tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-67196665217575000022024-03-06T22:34:00.794-05:00High Heeled Traveler"A place can really make your heart skip a beat, especially if you have to take a plane to get there." - Andy WarholUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger500125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-11569716965431500982017-01-07T14:51:00.001-05:002017-01-07T14:51:13.987-05:00Finding Peace Through Letting GoHello friends! In case you missed it, I did a spot of writing over on the MOPS International blog, Hello, Dearest over the holidays. <a href="http://www.hellodearest.org/finding-peace-through-letting-go/" target="_blank">Here's the link</a> in case you're interested in checking it out.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-25797015634977482952017-01-07T12:37:00.000-05:002017-01-07T12:37:14.244-05:00 Home is... where the suitcases are unpacked.<div style="text-align: justify;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi13i7T1fDZzqv3q7hnQfh4rWLVhbpfSAeX_846coI1pLD24gkv2RqvmZMp72eIOnDSu0ig1N48doVujojp_sujydXUtqFTrjohZ8GGvqbBYS7rGjxWXfyMPjpZKYANBePdjfbPHVxTBN8c/s1600/noah_on_train.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi13i7T1fDZzqv3q7hnQfh4rWLVhbpfSAeX_846coI1pLD24gkv2RqvmZMp72eIOnDSu0ig1N48doVujojp_sujydXUtqFTrjohZ8GGvqbBYS7rGjxWXfyMPjpZKYANBePdjfbPHVxTBN8c/s1600/noah_on_train.jpg" /></a></div>
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“But I want my old house. I don’t want my new house.” My precious two and a half year old son sighs to me as I cradle him, chest to chest, in my lap. He speaks so eloquently for his age and is remarkable mature in dealing with his daily life, but his soft baby hair tickling my face reminds me just how little he is. </div>
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In his short life we have moved six times. Home has been where mama is. Home has been where the familiar is. Home has been a hotel room with the smell of cheap coffee brewing. Home has been Nana and Pop’s house with Yorkie dogs barking. Home has been a familiar Camelbak filled with favorite apple juicy. Home has been mama’s breast and mama’s arms. Home has been Daddy's voice.</div>
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This move has been the hardest for all of us. After living a year and a half separated from Daddy he was reintroduced to our family. The transition, while exciting, was difficult. On top of that the home that had been our sanctuary – the first home we owned together - was now going to be for someone else. When we purchased the home we intended to keep it for the long term so that even though we didn’t have imminent plans of living in Florida, we’d be able to have a vacation home and a place to retire to eventually. It was going to be our haven and the place we imagined being happiest. Our own corner of paradise, 10 minutes from white sandy beaches. But plans change, budgets change, and we had to let go of that dream to give way to others. </div>
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So then, there was no concrete answer for “where is home?” as we lived out of suitcases in a furnished long-term stay apartment for almost six weeks. We couldn’t go back and moving forward wasn’t happening soon enough. There is no explaining the experience of transition to a young mind. Now is always temporary.</div>
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With all this transition however, what Noah has been exposed to in his short life is astounding. All of these experiences are absorbed into his ready mind and heart. He reflects on them, too. He’s always thinking, always observing. Much more so than I ever expected or realized a person his age could. </div>
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He speaks often of Geneva. We went there on vacation last summer and met Daddy there while living apart. We rented a home and pretended we lived there for about 12 days. Geneva is the measuring stick for his other life experiences. Nothing is and nothing will ever be as good as Geneva; the ice cream was better, the toys, the city, the playground, the life there was just complete. The memory of Geneva - mommy and daddy giving him our undivided attention 24/7 exploring new things together - is home for Noah. It’s his happy place and what he craves when he is sad or unsure. I didn’t realize it at first, when he cried for Geneva, but there is a concrete place for “home” in his heart after all and it wasn’t anything I had planned.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-34157979002925681872016-12-21T07:00:00.000-05:002016-12-21T07:00:14.882-05:00Travel vs the diaper change<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9vwhT-ZcknrUV3KzhhR9yHSMTou5-A1ejv-q7pBleJV4dJ4_VhOwbF4JsdaplZfwYLaCRTR78uWDvUZC_NqPwYD8CvWqtF6CkO_ARIllYvbaqp_J0d5BQIYy1SfBeTfDJ1aioKab0K9wM/s1600/noah_fireman_blog.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9vwhT-ZcknrUV3KzhhR9yHSMTou5-A1ejv-q7pBleJV4dJ4_VhOwbF4JsdaplZfwYLaCRTR78uWDvUZC_NqPwYD8CvWqtF6CkO_ARIllYvbaqp_J0d5BQIYy1SfBeTfDJ1aioKab0K9wM/s1600/noah_fireman_blog.jpg" /></a></div>
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This is one of the best travel tips I can give you. Since
Noah was born we’ve traveled extensively on three continents, by plane, train,
boat, car, bike, stroller, metro… you name it! There are lots of little tricks
I’ve come up with to get me through those days but I will share with you now
the most useful thing I’ve learned in traveling with a baby and now <s>toddler</s>
preschooler. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Learn to change your kid’s diaper while they’re standing. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Cambria; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I can say that most places are not equipped with
nursing or changing stations. Most bathrooms are nasty and even if they have a
changing station, I worry about the last time it was tended to. When Noah was a
baby I used to find a discreet place to recline his stroller and change him
there. I can stealth change him if I still need to or change him in
the car, but being able to take him to the bathroom with me anywhere, including
moving trains, or any non-kid oriented restaurant or store, is really
vital to my well-being. It gives us the flexibility to spend the day doing
whatever we want, wherever we want without being hampered. Start practicing at
home now and thank me later.</span><!--EndFragment-->
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-80756943307917279462016-12-20T14:42:00.000-05:002016-12-20T14:42:25.953-05:00Where do we go from here?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /><br />One of my biggest fears when I was pregnant was that having a baby would cramp my style. I’m not talking fashion (although, good-bye silk) I’m talking about lifestyle. I was worried we would cease to see the world or lose our desire to leave the house. <br /><br />At first it was tricky. It took a solid two months for my baby Noah and I to figure each other out, and get in the swing of nursing. But we ripped that travel band-aid off when Noah was only 2 and a half months old on our first 14 hour international flight from Florida back to Kuwait. Two weeks later, we were off to Scotland and a few months after that Israel. We have moved, traveled, visited, and toured many places in Noah’s short two and a half years and I’ll say this about it: It’s worth it. <br /><br />It’s worth schlepping the bags of diapers and car seats and strollers and 3 changes of clothes up a mountain to see the view. It’s worth the cost of the ticket to see the dots connecting in your child’s mind when they understand that they’re on a train, they’ve seen trains in books and on TV, and played with toy trains. It’s worth the trouble of bringing a change of clothes to a farm so that your toddler hears a cow moo, touches their fur, and sees where the milk comes from. It’s true that in a way he won’t remember these exact experiences, but they are shaping his understanding of the world around him. <br /><br />I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about this blog and where I want it to go. What do I have to say? My life has profoundly changed since having a child. It has forced me to mature and grow in ways that have been painful and triumphant. I’ve learned to be incredibly comfortable with who I am and I can see a difference in my relationships. But what aspects of my life do I want to share? And if I wear sneakers like 90% of the time and loafers the other 10, does that still qualify me as a High Heeled Traveler? <br /><br />I say, yes. It does. I named the blog High Heeled Traveler as a rift on Well Heeled Traveler. It’s like the real life version of something that seems fancy. Here’s our life in a nutshell: We move. We travel. We share the world with our growing son. And I try to do it without losing myself. High Heeled to me is asking for my experiences to be elevated, to be better, to be richer. I want to live life deeper and enjoy the moment. Not since becoming a mother did I realize just how quickly life really does pass us by. And it’s in those little moments where we slow down and check it out (sometimes at a toddler’s pace), that we truly feel alive and find that connection to the world around us. <br /><br /> What I want to do in my little corner of the Internet is to start a dialogue about the beauty in the moments no matter if they’re at home, in an exotic far-away place, or on the plane getting there. I hope you’ll continue to join me!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-63275463822489124652016-12-20T13:43:00.000-05:002016-12-20T13:43:17.009-05:00Unaccompanied Tour // 04<div style="text-align: justify;">
Navigating the R&Rs can be a source of both excitement and stress to the unaccompanied family. For non foreign service people, R&R means what it means in normal life, a break, a rest, a vacation. Depending on the post (location) and the length of the assignment, the employee gets one to three R&Rs during their time apart. We actually had one when we were in Kuwait and took a trip to Scotland for Noah's baptism and to visit some friends. For this assignment Gman had three.</div>
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While it is exciting to see the person who has been gone, an R&R is also a reality check on relationships, and a really stressful adjustment to the family dynamic. Gman teases me about messing with my routine every time but that's a serious sticking point for me. I'm a creature of intense habit. I got mad at him one time he was home because he did the laundry. It sounds ridiculous but it was something I was used to doing and something so little was magnified by the stress of reuniting.</div>
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When we finished our last R&R (praise God!) I took some time to reflect on it. I want to share with you some thoughts, observations, suggestions that we have learned along our almost year and a half of separation in regards to reuniting on R&R.</div>
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We found it difficult to pretend "normal life" as if Gman lived there when he came home. Everyone wanted to visit with him and the time slipped from our fingers. After trying to cram our entire lives into an emotional two weeks we decided the best route was to make the time off (usually 2 weeks) a vacation for everyone. It was actually really nice that way, even if Gman came home and we took day trips or just laid around at the beach all day. This way I was off the clock too and we spent more time together instead of me worried about the to-do list while Gman spent time with everyone else. It also helped the dynamic between Noah and us, as children tend to push the boundaries and act up when the separated parent returns. Being on vacation changed the rules anyways and he was less likely to push us. </div>
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Dealing with extended family can also be difficult at times. Of course everyone wants to visit with the person who has been away and they're only home a few short weeks. But the reality is connecting with one's children is really the most important thing. Adults understand how to use a telephone and can maintain a relationship most of the time through that and FaceTime, etc. It's more difficult for children, especially little ones and they really need that physical touch to maintain a connection. We found it helpful to arrange special time with our parents and sisters so everyone felt like they got one on one but it didn't take away from time with Noah. We also had a special happy hour for friends and family who wanted to see us. </div>
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Another thing that really helped us reconnect in such a short time was to make lists of things we wanted to be sure to talk about. We didn't really talk over the phone too much or even in email when he was away so if I wanted to be sure and ask about something financial or mention a cute story that happened I wrote it down. It sounds excessive but, again, the time goes by quickly and there are a lot of distractions. Having a list helps ensure you talk about the things you had been waiting to talk about for a few months of separation.</div>
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I hope this is helpful to you!</div>
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Please see my previous posts on surviving The Unaccompanied Tour // <a href="http://highheeledtraveler.blogspot.com/2016/04/the-unaccompanied-tour-01_28.html" target="_blank">01</a> <a href="http://highheeledtraveler.blogspot.com/2016/05/the-unaccompanied-tour-02.html" target="_blank">02</a> <a href="http://highheeledtraveler.blogspot.com/2016/07/the-unaccompanied-tour-03_31.html" target="_blank">03</a></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-67086212043349670322016-07-10T13:26:00.008-04:002016-07-13T08:20:23.031-04:00The Unaccompanied Tour // 03<div style="text-align: justify;">
Anger Management.</div>
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A big part of the unaccompanied tour is frankly how infuriating it can be. I say this half-joking. For example, in my normal life whenever I need reassurance or to bounce ideas off someone I just call or text Gman or simply turn to him and ask. He's there and he's my sounding board. Suddenly now he's not there and not even available to send a text to in a moment of desperation when Noah is just too much for me to handle. My partner is not there when the cards start to fall or even to tell me I'm beautiful in a moment when I sure as hell don't feel like it. I am often alone in dealing with bills, taking care of our home, and meeting the needs of Noah and myself on a daily basis. </div>
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I don't get a break when Gman would normally come home from work. Fellow stay-at-home moms know, it's like the magically hour from 4 - 5 or 5 - 6 when everyone is ready for something new and Daddy will be home any minute to take over for just a little while. Well I don't have that. I just have to keep going. It can be exhausting and just getting through a night where Noah fights me on everything, like "time to brush your teeth" "no! not brush teeth!" and he holds his mouth closed and puts his hands on his face. And then "time to read a story" "no! not story!" and tries to throw himself out of my arms and I'm already ready to pass out myself. Yeah, those days are rough. And long. And lonely. Those are the days when burn out turns to rage and I have to keep myself in check. </div>
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Here are some things I do to help manage my anger in a healthy way. And some I should be doing more often... I hope you find this helpful, too!</div>
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<i>1. Take time for myself every day.</i> This one is really much harder than you would imagine. Like before I had Noah, this was not a problem. I spent hours doing my hair every week. Now I can't tell you the last time I used a blow dryer. In fact, I didn't have one for several months. I even cut my own hair for two years. But when I take a few minutes to just have quiet time and file my nails it helps to calm me down. Whatever it is that helps you rejuvenate, do it. Maybe a cup of coffee when the kids go down for a nap or watching stand-up on Netflix for a few minutes at night. I am trying a new routine where I set my alarm and get up every morning to exercise before breakfast. It's difficult because Noah wakes up with me but so far it has helped make our mornings smoother and given me a little boost of energy. Which leads me to...</div>
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<i>2. Exercise.</i> Exercise really helps soften anger. It gives you a place to put that energy and can lessen stress and anxiety also. It's hard for me to make this a priority, but the more I do it the more I notice a difference in my mood.</div>
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<i>3. Talk to a therapist.</i> Trying to figure out what my trigger points are and how to deal with them really gets to the source of the anger. You're going to have to deal with that eventually and talking to a therapist is a great place to start sorting through your thoughts and feelings. </div>
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<i>4. Walking away and then talking it through.</i> Sometimes I get so furious that I need a timeout more than Noah. I need to teach him that its OK to be angry and show him ways to deal with it. Walking away and taking a time out is a great physically obvious way to calm down. I teach Noah to count to 10 and take 3 deep breaths. Then we talk about why we are angry. I tried this recently with Gman too and it prevented a fight. I walked away then came back when I collected my thoughts. Walking away is not to be confused with the silent treatment which is passive aggressive and not helpful in resolving conflict. I mean saying, "I need a break" or "Give me a minute" and disengaging. In my frustration with Gman I came back after calming down and said, "This is why I'm angry with you." We were able to talk through it without either of us being defensive. We even laughed about it later.</div>
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<i>5. Find the humor. </i>The best way to defuse angry is with humor. Finding levity in your life will help bring you back to center. One night I was so furious with Noah I thought I was going to hurt him. I was scared of my rage and told him, "mommy's very very angry right now and I need to take some deep breaths. I need you to be nice to me while I'm angry, Noah." He replied by basically mocking me. He clenched his fists, gritted his teeth, and growled! It was both insulting and totally adorable. I had to laugh at his attempt to show me he understood what I was saying. Soon laughter completely diffused my anger. After I put him to bed I thought about why I was angry and tried to find a solution to my issue. </div>
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<i>6. Ask for help.</i> Ask friends, family, parents, babysitters to help you get through this really difficult time. It's hard for me to reach out sometimes because I don't even know what to ask for. So here are some ideas: ask your parents to watch your children for a night and you go to a hotel and order room service. Or maybe it's a girls night out or a coffee date with a good book. Maybe you ask someone to cook with you once a week or invite friends over for a small party or a glass of wine. Socializing and taking breaks from the daily grind stop me from being all consumed with all the things that are pissing me off. Sometimes simply voicing my frustration helps diffuse it. Sending a text to my sister like, ugh you won't believe the night I've had and her responding with a ridiculous meme or just saying, that sucks, really helps.</div>
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One last note on anger. Don't be afraid of anger. It's a healthy, normal feeling to have. And it's a powerful one too. We have seen far too many examples lately on the news of blind, ignorant rage destroying lives. But anger has lead to some incredibly positive changes in the world too like cures for cancer, fights against poverty and injustice and hunger. If you think of it this way, you can use your anger to make some positive changes in your life too.<br />
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Previous posts on The Unaccompanied Tour: <a href="http://highheeledtraveler.blogspot.com/2016/04/the-unaccompanied-tour-01_28.html" target="_blank">// 01</a>, <a href="http://highheeledtraveler.blogspot.com/2016/05/the-unaccompanied-tour-02.html" target="_blank">// 02</a></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-3598043799520157502016-06-12T13:38:00.000-04:002016-06-12T13:38:16.025-04:00Date Truffles for the Win<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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At the beginning of the year I went on a no sugar cleanse. The first couple of days sucked, the withdrawal headaches and mood swings were difficult to deal with. But then by like day three, it really wasn't as hard as I expected. I didn't give up things like milk that had sugar naturally in them, but food made with sugar and all processed food. I was fine until about 10 days in. I was having the most intense cravings for chocolate. It was like the only thing I really missed. I got in a bad habit of sneaking chocolate chips with Noah around 10 in the morning which is when I usually crave sweets. So I found myself dragging my feet around the kitchen opening and closing pantry doors hoping that chocolate would magically appear. I'm not the only one why does this right?<br />
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So then, I was talking to my neighbor, who is an avid cook as well, and she told me that she just throws some dates, raw cacao powder, and almonds into a food processor and makes truffles out of it. Dates are possibly Noah's favorite food (ranked high with avocados, yogurt, chocolate, and ice cream) so I got pretty excited.<br />
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I make these date truffles at least twice a week and I have a hard time not eating all of them as I roll them out. Noah stands at my feet while I'm preparing them, begging for "more dates, sir!" These are indulgent little treats you can enjoy guilt free. In fact, when I was on Weight Watchers I entered this recipe in to calculate my points and it came back as zero points for several truffles. FREE DESSERT while on a diet? Hell yes!<br />
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So without further adieu, here's what you do...<br />
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Combine about 8-15 pitted medjool dates, a small handful of roasted unsalted almonds (if whole grind alone first to break down, if slivered just throw them in), and 1 tbsp raw cocoa powder in a food processor until they come together and can be formed into bite-sized balls. Depending on how moist the dates are I may at one or two more after blitzing the mixture a few times so that the "dough" comes together. You might add more chocolate too if you use a higher number of dates. Pinch off pieces of dough and roll the balls in unsweetened coconut flakes. Use your hands to press the flakes into the truffle so that it is no longer sticky and the flakes don't fall off. You could also roll them in the cacao powder. I like the texture the coconut flakes give it. And besides I put coconut flakes in almost everything.<br />
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Enjoy!<br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-24215610927189290192016-05-05T15:36:00.000-04:002016-05-05T16:24:34.034-04:00 The Unaccompanied Tour // 02<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdhFYZRFgeNr7cyXqljf6Fy5qkvIY8hV9fqEwot-1ZSqrT6cwRW1NjyDHBJrvnqRoGDBPfOqgaOpAFvQO6K4PbZeuxlvLHyWIC2_jo4zm6dHfNJA7d27Umd3j798mH9oF2Ga7BbBFlj-eA/s1600/Massage_hands_blog.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdhFYZRFgeNr7cyXqljf6Fy5qkvIY8hV9fqEwot-1ZSqrT6cwRW1NjyDHBJrvnqRoGDBPfOqgaOpAFvQO6K4PbZeuxlvLHyWIC2_jo4zm6dHfNJA7d27Umd3j798mH9oF2Ga7BbBFlj-eA/s1600/Massage_hands_blog.jpg" /></a></div>
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While it's possible to keep in touch by sending care packages and talking on FaceTime or the phone regularly. One of the hardest parts of the unaccompanied tour is the physical separation. My toddler is constantly hanging on me and sleeps on my chest, but that isn't always the physical touch I'm longing for. Sometimes I need my husband's touch, which is something I cannot get through any sort of technology. So what to do? I'm a very affectionate and touchy person so this part of the unaccompanied tour is especially difficult for me.</div>
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My mom once told me about a single friend of hers who regularly got massages to aid in her physical loneliness. It fulfilled her need to be touched when she was without a partner. I've also heard about the healing powers of touch and massage in leprosy communities and in nursing homes. So Gman and I decided to give it a try. It's not a 100% replacement for each other but getting twice monthly massages has made a huge difference in quelling that longing feeling.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-48517715929975797102016-05-04T17:58:00.000-04:002016-05-04T17:58:03.061-04:00Parenting 101I thought it would be fun to share quick little quips about those every day moments that you just never thought you'd find yourself in until the day you became a parent. So to keep it snappy, here's the first one…<br />
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When its 8:15pm and you find yourself alone in the garage shaking up a Manhattan sweating with fear that the sound of it will wake your tiny sleeping child.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-40750050139740635252016-04-28T07:00:00.000-04:002016-04-28T11:27:57.554-04:00The Unaccompanied Tour // 01<div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">How an unaccompanied tour feels.</td></tr>
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It has been nearly a year since Gman and I started our unaccompanied tour. We have a long distance marriage while Gman works overseas and Noah and I camp out in the US. In Gman's job with the US Department of State many families will have to endure this hardship at some point in the employee's career. It's a matter of when it will work into the family dynamic, financial benefits or concerns, etc. For us it seemed to work best to do it while Noah is so young and resilient.</div>
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We still have another half a year to go. We learned a lot during our separation about our marriage, each other, ourselves, and what we want and don't want out of life. I'd like to share some of the things I learned with you in a series about our unaccompanied tour. I have searched for support online through blogs, websites, Facebook groups, etc. and while there is some stuff out there I really feel on my own about the decisions I have to make and the lifestyle that we lead. </div>
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So I hope this series will answer some questions, give some insight, and share some stories to help myself and others like me feel empowered during this difficult journey. </div>
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<i>So let's dive into the first one...</i></div>
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The separation is an emotional roller coaster. When Gman is here, we have our whole marriage in two weeks. When he's gone, we barely talk about anything. There are days when I feel on top of the world - I cleaned the house, cooked for the week, and Noah is dressed and ready for the day all before 10am. Other times I feel defeated before the first demand for juice is uttered. It comes down to taking the time to invest in myself and my health. Here's what I do to feel calm, grounded, and joyful. </div>
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1. <b><i>Sleep.</i></b> I make sleep a number one priority over everything else in my life; chores, meeting friends, anything besides taking care of Noah or myself when we need it. Noah has a bedtime routine and so do I. When he goes down, I do a little dance on the way to the shower because I know now it's me time. When I regularly get at least eight hours it is the difference between "I got this" and "OMG why is this happening."</div>
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2. <i><b>Eat right. </b></i>For me, it truly it makes a difference. When I eat healthy I feel good and energetic.</div>
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3. <b><i>You guessed it - exercise!</i></b> I try to build it into my day with an active lifestyle. Noah and I ride my bike everywhere we can and go for 20 minute walks at least twice a day. If I'm really good I practice yoga during Noah's mid-day nap. Once in a while I'll be able to go to a class somewhere, too. Between that and a good night's sleep, I feel unstoppable!</div>
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4. <b><i>Have downtime.</i></b> I give myself more downtime now then I did when Gman and I were in the same house. When I put Noah to bed, I don't do anything else besides have my downtime. No dishes, no laundry, no responsibilities. They all have to wait for tomorrow. Every night I curl up in bed and read for at least an hour, usually two. </div>
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5. <b><i>Have a support network.</i></b> Single parenting is not for the faint of heart. Many times there is no one to tap in for you at the end of a long day. No one to pinch hit when you just want to sleep but your little one is crying from their crib, standing in a pool of throw-up at 3am... </div>
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I live across the street from my parents, which makes it convenient for them to help me out. Sometimes my mom will unexpectedly be able to watch Noah for an hour, or my dad will come over, do the dishes and take out the trash. It's those little things that make me feel like the burden of my family is not all on my shoulders (even if it usually is). I'll still be cleaning puke up all by my lonesome at 3am but at least I know that someone nearby will have a large cup of hot coffee waiting for me in the morning when I call.</div>
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I go to a weekly bible study class with other adults. It's really nice to talk about something other than being a mom. It's a safe, emotionally rewarding, and sometimes intellectually stimulating environment that I find helps me release some of my anger or exasperation from the week as well as gain a new perspective on my life. </div>
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I see a therapist regularly. With my husband and confident unavailable, therapy gives me a place to have constructive conversations about myself, my heart, my fears, and my dreams. </div>
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6. <b><i>Lastly, go easy on yourself.</i></b> It's ok if you don't get to everything in one day. It's ok if the dishes sit in the sink while you place horsey with your toddler, or if you make dinner plans with a friend and leave the bedtime routine to another caretaker now and then. Having a rough day so you drank an extra glass of wine or snuck some ice cream while hiding from your kids in the garage? It's totally fine. Tomorrow will be better.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-15277619367428479682016-04-27T13:32:00.002-04:002016-04-27T13:32:47.352-04:00Daddy Lives on an Airplane and Other Truisms from the Mouth of a Toddler<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />Raising a young child can be exhausting, rewarding, and hilarious all in the same moment. One of my favorite things about parenting is witnessing Noah's mind adsorb the world around him. Sometimes I'm astonished at how much he understands and other times I wish I could explain things better. Luckily he has a pretty good vocabulary and he tells me what he thinks. Some of the things he says are downright hilarious, others incredibly insightful. Here are a few things Noah knows to be true:<br /><br />1. Daddy takes an airplane to work and either lives on the plane or somehow takes the plane to work and resides inside the computer. He used to leave things for Gman on my keyboard, like bits of food or toys.<br /><br />2. Somehow Santa Claus is friends with the firemen and rides around with them the weeks preceding Christmas, when he isn't posing for pictures at the mall of course. It's rumored that Santa even stays at the firehouse when he's in town.<br /><br />3. Almost every job requires a special hat.<br /><br />4. Saying "I'll be right back" is much less emotionally stressful than saying "goodbye."<br /><br />5. If one is eating chocolate one needs at least enough to fill two hands.<div>
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6. "Milkies" live in mommys' breasts and it's made especially for each of their babies. He is concerned about any breast dangling alone in the world, it should be occupied by a suckling infant. If boobs are prominently displayed (like in art) he'll ask me where the lady's baby is. </div>
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7. If we are out of anything, it's not a problem, we can buy some more.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-27184650220086694762016-03-17T11:03:00.000-04:002016-03-17T11:03:47.826-04:00Hello again, hello.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Hi. It's me, Jamie. Do you remember me? It's been so long since I last blogged. I've missed it like a second child. I think about blogging all the time and compose cute little posts in the shower or while I'm cleaning up a poopy diaper. Unfortunately, these clever treatise never actually get written down or even remembered moments later. I miss taking pictures and sharing my life with family, friends, and random strangers on the internet. Hello to you all and welcome back!</div>
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This post will serve as a life update and planning space for new posts to come. My goal is to blog regularly again even if it's just little snippets here and there. I'd like to just blog about life, those little moments that make our days hilarious, heartbreaking, and worthwhile. Noah and I are living separately from Gman as he is on an unaccompanied tour (more on that later). I'll be blogging about the separation in hopes to help others get through similar situations. I will also blog about traveling with a tiny toddler as we are still pretty mobile.</div>
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Noah, my son, turns two in just a few weeks and it has got me thinking about the last couple of years. What sucked my creative juices? Surely there are many bloggers out there who start families and continue blogging straight through. Why not me? Here's my theory in a nutshell: BURN OUT.</div>
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My brain has been completely fried. We moved to Kuwait from DC when I was just a few weeks pregnant and I went into a depression. Then I moved back and forth to Florida and over the course of two years we split our time on three continents. While I will never trade what I saw and experiences for anything, in hindsight I realize there are some times when it's OK to stay put and enjoy a cup of coffee on the porch. In two years we were in Kuwait, Israel, Scotland, London (twice), DC, Tampa, Fort Myers, Palm Beach, and Orlando. We took some trips back to back and others lasted several weeks. We moved back to Florida last May. I thought I would start feeling stable again, but had a complete undoing when I underestimated the repatriation experience and how lonely it was coming back to the US after living overseas.</div>
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I'd like to say everything has been ok but really the last eight months have been a healing process. Slowly but surely I've been getting healthier (mentally and physically) and getting my life balance back. I feel very good now and like a better version my old self. I've got a handle on parenting, with a spouse and without. We bought a house, a car, and settled into a good old-fashioned routine. I'd like to thank my family for their patience and support, my therapist for her time, and a renewed faith in God that has brought me out of some dark places.</div>
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Now, Noah and I live in Dunedin, Florida in a tiny 1950s bungalow 15 minutes from three of the most beautiful beaches in the world. We ride our bike to adorable shops, great local dining, several craft breweries, ice cream, coffee shops, and playgrounds. It's pretty romantic to say the least.</div>
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As I mentioned, Gman doesn't live here. This has been the hardest part. He is a diplomat with the US Department of State and is living for one year overseas on an unaccompanied assignment eating his weight in curry. We see him for a few weeks every few months. The hardship has been no joke.</div>
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Despite it all, life is better than ever and so full of moments living outside my comfort zone, embracing the surprises around the corner. So, what do you say. Are you ready for a new adventure with the High Heeled Traveler?</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-46417706296378051552015-05-04T06:00:00.000-04:002015-05-04T06:00:08.633-04:00Yasmin Farm Tour<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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A couple of months ago (already!) Gman, Noah, and I signed up to go on a farm tour out in the middle of the desert near the Saudi Arabia boarder in Wafra. The flyer sounded promising with lines like "everything from fresh cheese to fresh fruit and vegetables are produced here" and "dairy cows, chickens, goats, large vegetable fields and even climate controlled greenhouses." It also said there was a fully stocked shop with dried fruit, olive oil, spices, etc. and "unique wooden trays and chairs for sale" as well as a small cafe. All of this plus a free tour with samples at the end. It sounded like a good day trip, a rare thing here.</div>
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The day started off rough. In general, Noah and I rarely leave our neighborhood, Salmyia. There is just no reason to. We have pretty much everything we could want within walking distance including four malls and at least one or two of every chain restaurant in Kuwait. And if we really want we can have whatever it was that we wanted delivered, including such delicacies as ice cream, french fries, and popcorn. Whenever we do leave Salmyia we are usually disappointed. We spend half the time sitting in traffic (with a baby who HATES the car) and when we get there, the experience turns out to be kind of crappy. I think my expectations are too high. Anyways, so as we leave Salmyia at 7:30am on a Saturday, it starts pouring rain. It might have been the only time it rained in Kuwait this year and it was the only time we planned on an outdoor activity. The rain confused and delayed the already haphazardly organized event. Somehow we made it to the farm in one piece and with dry weather. On the way there we drove through the flattest sandiest desert that was just barely separated from the road by piles of trash. That's when we got to see camels and a burned out car too! The day was getting interesting…</div>
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Upon arrival the the farm we are told to cover our feet in plastic for the duration of the tour. This was to prevent unwanted germs (bacteria? disease? pathogens?) from getting near the plants and animals. I realized halfway through the tour (it was hard to hear the guide because it was such a large group) that the farm, Yasmin Farm, was actually the supplier for the organic and local section of our beloved grocery store, Sultan Center, and in fact owned by Sultan Center. The produce and dairy products are indeed fresh (and delicious) but you pay for the luxury of having hours old cow's milk in hand in geographic location where that type of farming is not indigenous. Look for the brand Alban Dairy.</div>
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I was impressed with the cleanliness and thoroughness of the parts of the farm we saw - mainly the cows and goats. We couldn't see the chickens because they are so susceptible to airborne illness that they are kept under lock and key in an immaculate building where they experience the free-range lifestyle in air conditioning. Our guide Katherine also happened to be the farm manager and was definitely in charge of making sure everything met American standards as far as quality of care for animals and maintenance of facilities. One interesting thing was that every functioning part of the far was covered by a roof. Normally you think of rolling hills of corn or beautiful rows of strawberries when you think of a farm, but here mostly everything was covered in greenhouses or under a roof with open sides. It made sense because of the heat, and you could see that also adding to the cost of doing business. Speaking of the heat, an interesting thing Katherine mentioned on the tour was that they have to add molasses to the cow's feed in the summer because they lose their appetite when it hits 100! </div>
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Since most of the tour was about dairy farming, cows and goats, Katherine kept saying the work "milk." We saw lots of utters and even a baby goat nursing from his mother. Somehow the message of milk got across to Noah, because he was diving at my chest the entire time signing for "eat." We couldn't help but laugh, especially when we then noticed our friend's baby rooting around too. </div>
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It was fun to sample the products at the end of the tour, then see them in the shop. It was a visual reminder of which products were the local ones for when we got back home and went to the store. They also had fresh milk for sale in metal tins. We obviously had to get one even though we normally don't drink milk! </div>
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The only disappointing thing about our visit was that there wasn't a cafe (or unique trays and chairs for sale). So when the tour was over we basically just left. We had planned all the driving during Noah's naps (= peaceful drive) so the car ride home, hungry and tired, was a doozy. It would have been nice to be able to plan ahead and pack a picnic to have there or in the car on the way home. </div>
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<i>If you are interested in visiting Yasmin Farms in Wafra, the tour is free and you do not need reservations to my knowledge. I recommend going on a Saturday morning around 9am like we did. At one point they had a website, but now I can't find it. So...</i></div>
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<i>I also have the GPS coordinates (which say you're going to Saudi but you aren't, so don't worry). But the Garmin is already packed and en route to the US. When I get it on the other end I'll update this post with the coordinates! </i></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-45953566950362814082015-05-02T08:17:00.000-04:002015-05-02T08:17:43.456-04:00Downtown Kuwait City<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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When we found out we were moving to Kuwait, I typed "Kuwait City" into Google to see what images came up. I was curious to see what our new home was going to look like. Much to my disappointment there weren't really any images of Kuwait at all. Everything that I thought was Kuwait ended up being Dubai or Oman or even Jordan in a few cases. I had to wait until I got here and drove around to really get a sense of the place. As romantic as that sounds, for me it was terrifying. I needed to know so I could start imagining myself living here.</div>
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So with that in mind, I wanted to show you so images of Kuwait. I took these pictures hanging out the window of our car as we drove around. While they aren't the most beautiful images, I hope you can see some of the goings-on of everyday life. </div>
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These pictures are of the downtown area. It is the oldest part of town and what is officially called Kuwait City. It's where the heritage souk is (where my rug dealer is!) and the fabric souk. What I find interesting about it is that it is jam-packed with activity and people with an incredible range of architectural styles represented. Mostly poor immigrants live downtown in complete squaller. In general they don't do much maintenance on buildings, cars, etc. here and I'm under the impression that it's a cultural thing throughout Arab countries. There's also orange dust covering everything.</div>
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Notice the air conditioning units stuffed in the walls and people crossing wherever in the road. There's also a mosque in the middle of a round about. I guess they really want you to feel thankful when you get there! My favorite building is the Gulf Bank building. It's the yellow looking one (detail pictured last) that looks like a relic from the 1950s. I love that it looks like it's from the Jetsons. </div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-66685724327681793252015-05-01T06:00:00.000-04:002015-05-01T06:00:03.823-04:00Dhows<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Dhows (pronounced <i>d-how</i> with a soft 'h') are the traditional boats of Kuwait. Kuwait City is an important port in the Gulf and has always heavily relied on the seas for all of it's needs, including trade and food. Before big shipping tankers and pleasure yachts, Dhows were used for all those seafaring needs, with different designs used for each purpose and made by hand. There were dhows for pearl diving, fishing, trade, and even to bring fresh water back from other places! Now there are only fishing dhows still in use but a few were made for display at the Scientific Center (good sampling of the range of design) and at the National Museum. The ones pictured are anchored at the dhow harbor in downtown Kuwait City as you drive towards the <a href="http://highheeledtraveler.blogspot.com/2014/01/destination-grand-mosque-of-kuwait.html" target="_blank">Grand Mosque</a> from the Kuwait Towers on Arab Gulf Road. We've driven past so many times and I'm glad I took the time to get out of the car and check it out one afternoon before it was too hot. </div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-64517540383225737632015-04-30T14:40:00.000-04:002015-04-30T14:40:24.441-04:00Guest Posting on New Diplomat's Wife<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I recently wrote a guest post for my friend Ania's series on her blog, <a href="http://www.thenewdiplomatswife.com/" target="_blank">The New Diplomat's Wife</a>, called Notes from the Field. The series was created to give you a glimpse into what it's like to live in different cities around the world. They are usually written from the perspective of a diplomat or diplomat's spouse (diplo-spouse as she calls it!) and are really fun to read. </div>
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I was incredible flattered when she asked me to write one for Kuwait City. Considering our time here is coming to a rapid end, it was a great excuse to look back on our life and let it all soak in. Go over to her blog and <a href="http://www.thenewdiplomatswife.com/2015/04/notes-from-field-kuwait-city-kuwait.html" target="_blank">read about Kuwait</a> and then get sucked in reading <a href="http://www.thenewdiplomatswife.com/search/label/Notes%20from%20the%20Field" target="_blank">all the rest</a>!</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-33646537203922198022015-04-13T06:00:00.000-04:002015-04-15T04:03:26.702-04:00Yoga with Baby<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5kytYU40owxmi8t0dHD70nqw-3IJnL9ELIiet3-GuFX8mPTVKfudRCgagRq_hN6GSKu70EUqbvpQmcUo8cNyuK0H603tuDS-ROLO_KogNgOaGDxhFXeFyjV0Fy8av1cUSn2WMTixBff8v/s1600/yoga_with_baby.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5kytYU40owxmi8t0dHD70nqw-3IJnL9ELIiet3-GuFX8mPTVKfudRCgagRq_hN6GSKu70EUqbvpQmcUo8cNyuK0H603tuDS-ROLO_KogNgOaGDxhFXeFyjV0Fy8av1cUSn2WMTixBff8v/s1600/yoga_with_baby.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">photo from my <a href="https://instagram.com/highheeledtraveler/" target="_blank">Instagram</a></td></tr>
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I don't like sweating. I'm not super coordinated. I wouldn't consider myself outdoorsy or athletic. All of these things make it a challenge for me to pump myself up for regular exercise. For most of my 20s I lived in places where I walked everywhere and with some yoga or a run sprinkled in here and there I was able to get away with not having a daily workout routine.<br />
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Now not only do I have the baby weight to lose but I also want to get in better physical shape to stay healthy and keep up with my energetic little buddy. I bought a running stroller and started running with him, but my poor knees rebelled. It has been difficult to exercise at home with a baby climbing all over me.<br />
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A friend of mine recently posted on her blog about an online yoga studio based out of LA called <a href="http://www.yogaglo.com/" target="_blank">YogaGlo</a>. (Go check out her blog, <a href="http://jennyweigle.com/home/" target="_blank">Jenny Weigle</a> and her <a href="http://jennyweigle.com/how-i-practice-yoga-on-a-budget/" target="_blank">post on the studio</a>!) They have tons of classes focusing on exercise, meditation, whatever you might be looking for to develop your practice. As Jenny mentioned in her post, they have classes from 5 minutes to 90 minutes and it's only $18 a month. (Friends with new babies or expecting babies - they have several pre and post natal classes!)<br />
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This sounded really appealing to me. I also don't have a car or extra time or a sitter for Noah, so driving to a studio or gym locally hasn't been an option. On top of that, I've been practicing yoga for over 10 years but haven't ever gotten past a certain point so I always feel slightly defeated when trying to go to the next level. I started taking the classes about 20 days ago (free trial for 15 days!) and I have already noticed a huge difference in my practice. I am already much stronger physically and more centered and calm emotionally. Most days I've been able to do an hour class but if I am tired (teething nights!) or needing to spend my time otherwise, then I can take a 20 or 30 minute class and still feel like I got a workout in. Plus it is much less sweaty than running and so I can go right from my workout to picking up Noah out of his crib and moving on with the day. I've also noticed a difference on the days I manage a workout I sleep much better and feel less anxious.<br />
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Is physical fitness a priority to you? How do you make time for it?Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-69760810172481027562015-04-09T03:18:00.000-04:002015-04-09T03:18:34.223-04:00Highland Spirit Bed & Breakfast, Dufftown, Scotland, UK<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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About 45 minutes west of Aberdeen, nestled in the rolling hills of the Scottish Highlands in an area called Speyside is the quaint village of Dufftown. It's the type of town where everybody knows everybody and within days of being there we had "the usual" at the local diner with our favorite waitress and legitimately passed people we knew in the street. The landscape is picturesque with luscious green hills, spotted with thick forests, beautifully manicured gardens, and grazing sheep, which one can hear always baa-ing in the distance.<br />
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The air is so fresh that coming from Kuwait where a mix of burning fossil fuels and orange dust constantly linger in the air, our lungs almost burned with relief having taken actual deep breaths. Not only is the air perfectly fresh but one can smell the dampness of whisky production in the air. Dufftown rightly calls itself the Malt Capital of the World boasting home to seven local whisky distilleries including one called Balvenie and another called Glenfiddich. I'm not sure if you've heard of them, they're so small and local (insert sarcasm). Of the seven distilleries within walking distance of downtown Dufftown, a few are open for tours and tastings, including those mentioned. And there are at least five or ten more within a short car or train ride (Aberlour, The Macallan, and Strathisla are a few). This place is a whisky lovers dream.<br />
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But we didn't go to Scotland for the whisky. Well okay we did, but it wasn't the only attraction. Several years ago friends of ours, Alistair and Karen, retired from their day jobs to pursue their dream of owning and running a bed and breakfast. They settled on the town of Dufftown and found a beautiful 19th century home which is now the <a href="http://www.highlandspiritbandb.co.uk/" target="_blank">Highland Spirit Bed and Breakfast</a>. It's one of those fantasy life changes that you see in the movies. However, renovating a historical home through blistering Scottish winters (and with no heater!) isn't exactly romantic. It's hard and tiresome (and did I mention cold?), making it a true labor of love.Yet they took every measure to renovate the home with historical and environmental concerns in mind. Every painstaking detail was considered and included throughout the home and grounds. The walls are covered with artwork from local artists, or have subject matter specific to the home. Even the teacups in each room are meaningful. (check out pictures of interior, more details on their renovation process, and history of the home on their website <a href="http://www.highlandspiritbandb.co.uk/" target="_blank">here</a>).<br />
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When Alistair and Karen began their venture, we began planning our visit. We finally decided to go the summer after Noah arrived and wanted to meet our families there to have him baptized. Before I knew it the tickets were booked and three and a half month old Noah was on a plane with Gman and me, Scotland bound.<br />
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When we arrived at the Highland Spirit our friends greeted us at our car and helped us inside. We had some tea while waiting for our families and getting the VIP tour of the house. There are three rooms each very comfortably furnished and outfitted with luxury toiletries in the bathroom and soft white sheets on the bed. We enjoyed complimentary (and delicious) coffee, tea, and Scottish shortbread cookies every afternoon in our room.<br />
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They also happily helped us plan our itinerary for our 10 day stay. There is more to do in the area besides whisky tasting. Even if you don't drink you wouldn't be short on recreational pursuits (fishing, hiking, and sight seeing to name a few). We had several days planned for tastings, day trips to the coast, visits to other towns and castles as well as plenty of time for putzing around town and going on several of the numerous local nature hikes (and naps for everyone!). There was not enough time in 10 days to do all there is to do! We planned our trip to be in town for the Highland Games as well (what a treat! more on that in another post). Everywhere we went the locals were so friendly and always ended up knowing our hosts. The familiarity made our whole trip there feel very homey and relaxing.<br />
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The bed and breakfast is not only the most comfortable place to stay, but it has seriously the best food in town. In keeping with their detail oriented design and service, the breakfast menu is a carefully edited selection of traditional Scottish favorites. Yes they serve a full Scottish breakfast, but our favorite ended up being the reliable, filling, and a bit naughty porridge with honey and Monkey Barrel whisky. Yes, whisky in your porridge. I mean, why not? When in Rome…<br />
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One of the services that Alistair and Karen offer is packed picnic lunches. We took them up on this for one of our castle day trips and were so glad we did (and later wished we'd done it every day!). Again, they make the best food in town (and surrounding towns!) and we didn't have to do any planning or worrying about what and when we were going to eat.<br />
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As I mentioned above we wanted to have Noah baptized during our trip as well. I'll talk about it in more detail in a later post, but Karen used the same thoughtfulness she uses to take care of her bed and breakfast to make sure that everything - including setting up the pastor, bagpiper(!) and after party - were perfect for Noah's christening. I never had to raise a finger! I'm forever indebted to her kindness for making one the most meaningful moments of our life with Noah absolutely perfect - no exaggeration!<br />
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With seven adults and a baby there is potential for lots of standing around saying, "well what do you want to do," and room for meltdowns and fights. But because of our generous hosts and friends our visit to Scotland greatly exceeded our expectations (mine are always unrealistically high) and it is one of the experiences that I will never forget and can't stop talking about.<br />
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I highly recommend a stay with our friends in Dufftown. You will enjoy luxurious accommodations amongst an idyllic landscape filled with passionate, friendly people (and lots of whisky).<br />
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Visit their Facebook page <a href="https://www.facebook.com/HighlandSpiritBedAndBreakfast?fref=ts&ref=br_tf" target="_blank">here</a> and their website <a href="http://www.highlandspiritbandb.co.uk/" target="_blank">here</a>.<br />
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Love you guys!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-44348191989713093492015-04-08T06:00:00.000-04:002015-04-08T08:08:19.321-04:00Kuwait National Day<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Kuwait National Day and Liberation Day (the two most important holidays here besides the religious ones) were in February. I had the intention of watching the festivities all day and writing about it as I saw it but instead we decided to have a party and watch as a group. It was very fun to take turns with the binoculars! We were expecting complete chaos and 1,000s of revelers. I heard stories about how in years past one couldn't even walk through the main road along the water (Arab Gulf Road) because the traffic was so thick with cars and people. People suggested we go to the grocery store and stock up for several days because we wouldn't be able to get in and out of our apartment (since we live on that street). As we prepared to hunker down, a local non-Kuwaiti made a comment to us, "Oh, don't worry there won't be any traffic this weekend because all the Kuwaitis will be in Dubai drinking."</div>
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Maybe that was true because what really happened was pretty tame. Though not lacking in entertainment. There were two main ways of celebrating. One was decorating one's car with Kuwaiti flags. The one above won our prize for most festive. The thing on the top spun when he drove. It was quite fabulous as you can see. The other thing to do was sit in completely optional traffic and let children spray you and your car with super soaker water guns. The children were SUPER into it (no pun intended) and it was actually sweet to watch people purposefully slow down to let the kids get them. There was one kid who was sort of the ring leader (there's always one). Not only was he wearing a track suit but his father stood on the sidewalk behind him always ready with a back up water gun. Whenever he ran out of water he would go back to his dad for the other. It was completely indulgent and Kuwaiti and we loved it.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-7190848981437173402015-04-07T02:06:00.000-04:002015-04-07T02:06:36.286-04:00Digital Paintings<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfbJ79nJKDduqeuYHHqHE4x-1jRutmRD4afjVBmxKcwp90NQCHXWiEPvQBvaf0xKnuRTSWgZE4gIeDsvZdKM71lsuwdprfCDSTQhaZ_miBckbnK8NcMB_vNaFpB3p_8K2OQSSGzHvLookc/s1600/pomagranate.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfbJ79nJKDduqeuYHHqHE4x-1jRutmRD4afjVBmxKcwp90NQCHXWiEPvQBvaf0xKnuRTSWgZE4gIeDsvZdKM71lsuwdprfCDSTQhaZ_miBckbnK8NcMB_vNaFpB3p_8K2OQSSGzHvLookc/s1600/pomagranate.jpg" /></a></div>
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Last year I went to the <a href="http://gasparillaarts.com/" target="_blank">Gasparilla Festival of the Arts</a> in Tampa, Florida and purchased several new art pieces. One of them was a 12 x 12 inch painting of a blue boat floating lazily on greenish water. It made me think of the water of Florida, which is home to me, and I had to have it. The painting is called <a href="http://www.bumbleystore.com/mm5/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=BS&Product_Code=JL-D-02&Category_Code=JL-UD#" target="_blank">Blue Floating Dinghy #2</a> and is part of a <a href="http://www.lebenart.com/Dinghies.html" target="_blank">Dinghy Studies</a> series by artist John Leben. My mom bought <a href="http://www.bumbleystore.com/mm5/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=BS&Product_Code=JL-D-13&Category_Code=JL-UD#" target="_blank">Deserted Dinghy #13</a> and it is just stunning in person. </div>
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Leben is known for his whimsical imaginative paintings of houses and towns in unexpected places - like a whole treehouse town. He paints in Photoshop with a Wacom tablet. What I like about the painting I bought (and his other work) is that he actually has a nice brushstroke even though he isn't using a paintbrush to create the marks. The paintings are detailed and there are even smudges or searching lines. I like how fully he has developed the medium.</div>
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I use a Wacom tablet to edit and draw in Photoshop but I hadn't considered creating paintings with it before. So a year later, I started tinkering and it's really fun! I have no idea what I'm doing! The paintings I've been playing with, so amateur compared to Leben's, seem to develop like watercolors with the brushstrokes layering on top of each other. Above is a painting of a pomegranate; I'm having fun playing with the different shades of red. It has been fun to make little drawings and paintings that I have no intention of showing anyone. If I like something I can save it, if not I can delete it. There isn't any guilt for throwing away large pads of paper. Making digital paintings has also been an easy way to be creative while Noah is taking a nap. There is no set up or breakdown so I can use the whole hour I have to myself to paint. There isn't tempting toxic paint sitting out for tiny hands to get into either.</div>
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What do you think? Would you consider new mediums like digital painting and drawing as "real" art?</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-41872558460555007952015-04-06T06:00:00.000-04:002015-04-07T02:55:22.990-04:00Why I Love my TherapistWhen I was living in NYC it was the thing to go to a therapist. Everyone had one. People left the office during their lunch breaks to go to their therapists. They began sentences with "my therapist suggested…" and borderline bragged about it.<br />
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Otherwise going to a therapist has traditionally been seen as a negative thing. Something is wrong with you and you go to the psychologist/psychiatrist to be fixed. When one is going through the process to obtain a security clearance with the US government, on the form you fill out they ask you if you have ever had mental health counciling and if so what for. The question is in the section of questions about drug use and post traumatic stress. There isn't really an option to write, I like going to therapy to better myself. So in other words, would you consider going to a therapist if you weren't in a crisis?<br />
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Since having a baby I haven't had much time for myself. I have been all consumed with baby and his needs, wants, and potential needs and wants. Any extra time I would spend starring blankly at Gman while trying to take a deep breath or we would talk about logistics, to-do's, or how cute Noah is. All the while I had so much stirring in my heart. There has been so much change and yet I had never felt more at peace in all my life. For once I have no where to be but exactly where I am. But I also feel a huge desire to mature and grow. When I talked to my sister about it (she is a mental health councilor) she suggested I first read the book, Boundaries When to Say Yes and How to Say No (by Cloud and Townsend), then go talk to a therapist. She recommended a friend of hers in Denver.<br />
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That book was completely life changing for me. I didn't even know what boundaries were or why I needed them beforehand. Boundaries aren't putting up wall around you or in between you and your loved ones, like it sounds. It's about saying this is where you end and I begin. You worry about you, I worry about me then we can help each other out along the way. The book covers boundaries with your parents, spouse, children, friends, co-workers, and even understanding yourself more. It is very positive and uplifting. The main message is boundaries are used to establish deeper and more mature relationships as well as to help you carry only your own burden (not everyone's around you as some of us tend to do). I HIGHLY recommend it. It is written towards a Christian audience, so if you aren't Christian just sort of skim past that because the meat and potatoes is really not religious, it reads as common sense.<br />
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Once I read the book I started seeing my therapist. Being able to have an hour a week to talk about myself exclusively to someone who was paid to listen and advise me is really a treat. No where else in my life do I have this outlet. It has become something I look forward to twice a month. It is the only time I have that is completely uninterrupted and focused on me. Becoming a mother is truly wonderful, but it is so so easy to lose oneself in the whirlwind of it all. Going to my therapist has not only brought me back to myself but has allowed me to take action in creating more meaningful and mature relationships with myself and the people around me.<br />
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The experience of talking to a therapist has also been different than I expected. She doesn't just sit there and go "mmm, hmm" "and can you tell me more about that?" "How did that make you feel?" etc. We start each session with her asking me what I'd like to talk about that week. It can be anything and doesn't have to pick up where we left off last time. Even the weeks where I think, <i>should I cancel? Nothing has really happened. I don't even know what I'd talk about</i>, I end up filling a full hour with discussion. It's wonderful!<br />
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From this experience I feel strongly that you don't have to be in dire straights to go to a therapist. You can go to one because you might just have some questions about a relationship you're in or about a decision you have to make or simply just to have some time to yourself about yourself. I have been going since September and have already had some very intimate and confrontational talks with the people most important in my life. I would not have had these conversions in the past. Being honest and speaking with conviction from my heart has changed these relationships for the better and has built a platform for further development.<br />
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Not only that but I've discovered I'm an introvert. Who knew?Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-35600632589864407092015-04-02T06:00:00.000-04:002015-04-02T06:00:08.331-04:00Drinking Fountains in Kuwait<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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As you may already know, Kuwait is a desert and it gets really freakin' hot here in the summer. Like 120 degrees F and above. If it's not super hot it's still very dry and one can quickly become dehydrated. I drink about 64 oz of water or more a day and sometime it doesn't feel like enough. All around town they have public drinking fountains. They are free, cold, and 100% potable. You can just pull up next to one and fill up your water bottle. There aren't very many reliable public services here so I really like that this is one that actually works. I also love how they are all decorated, some with copies of traditional items, like the vase below, or local architecture, like the Kuwait tower. </div>
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com62tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-36741160638191226842015-04-01T06:00:00.000-04:002015-04-01T06:00:09.574-04:00My Birthing Story<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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It has taken me a year to write this post. That isn't because I have nothing to say. It's because I am petrified to try to sum up one of the most important and incredible life experiences I've ever had in 1,000 works. That experience was the birth of my son. Today is his first birthday, so I couldn't think of a more fitting time to finally share.<br />
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The process of becoming a mother is deeply intimate and yet it is one of the most common shared experiences we have as humans and women. I felt extremely private about my pregnancy and the goings on in my inner belly. How can you describe to someone who has not gone through it how it feels to have new life moving within you? It wasn't strange or alien, it was life giving and beautiful. I'd never felt so proud of my body and so proud to be a woman any other time in my entire life (culminating with the birth). Even the days where I was afraid to leave the house because I thought I might vomit in public or I was too fatigued to go in spite of it, when I looked in the mirror I felt beautiful. I felt free. I never once thought of myself as fat, ugly, or lacking. I was fulfilled and rightly glowing. To be free of the harsh criticism of my physical body was worth every hardship of carrying a child.<br />
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In the media, movies, blogs, causal talk amongst friends, you get a picture of what labor and deliver might be. The woman suddenly experiences water gushing from her body and is rushed to the hospital screaming at her husband/partner ("I hate you!" "Epidural!") while the doctor holds her legs in the air and she pushes five times and the baby is born. Then everyone is sweating and crying and in love and basically clapping. I guess in a way these things could be true but they weren't for me. I think it makes birth sound terrifying.<br />
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I was not afraid of childbirth. Even after way too many unsolicited horror stories of birthing gone wrong (why?!) I still felt excited to meet my son and see if he was as I had gotten to know him. Having the baby in my belly, I knew his habits and preferences already. I knew when he was up and when he slept. I knew when his active times were and if chocolate or caffeine seemed to affect him. He got hiccups at least 3 times a week and thought 4am was definitely the best time for gymnastics. Still, at 40 weeks I wasn't ready to share him with everyone else. I was really enjoying being pregnant at this point (all puking subsided after 12 weeks or so, thank god) and had no problem keeping Noah all to myself. I wasn't uncomfortable nor thought things like "get this baby out of me!" I felt pretty content. Apparently he did as well because at 41 weeks there was no sign of his exit.<br />
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Having a baby was the hardest thing I've ever done. When I thought I couldn't bear it for another second, I had to. When I thought my body was going to physically give up, I pushed through. When the pain was so intense I thought I might rather die, I felt relief. There was no turning back, no stopping, no relenting. But like all things, it passed with time. Yoga/meditative breathing, patience, determination, and a positive attitude got me through 80%, an epidural the other 20.<br />
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Despite my disappointment of not having a 100% natural unmedicated childbirth, and having to fight tooth and nail not to have a c-section even though we were healthy and strong, I had a satisfying labor and delivery. When Noah was placed on my chest I felt a calmness come over me. I felt peaceful and quiet and almost out of my body. He was so perfect and tiny and wonderful. He was like I had know him all along. I got to touch his precious hands and face and belly instead of just feeling them. I got to watch him quietly lay in his swaddle and check out the world around him.<br />
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I was suspicious and mildly grossed out by the idea of nursing, but once my baby was in my presence I felt comforted by his nuzzling around, latching on to my breast, and nursing for the first time. It was just supposed to happen. It felt natural and calming. He was a little suckling pro, too.<br />
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Afterwards, all I could think of was a six inch Italian sub from Publix with BBQ chips and a sweet tea. No joke. My father-in-law commented in amazement that he'd never seen me eat that fast. I stared at him with lettuce and drippings all over my face and hospital gown. I was STARVING. And then I didn't sleep for 9 months. The end.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-36456414390875800612015-03-30T06:00:00.000-04:002015-03-30T06:00:09.010-04:00Tea and Coffee<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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When we decided to move to a dry country, at first I was devastated (naturally) but then I got really excited about moving to a place where tea and coffee were the drink du jour. I couldn't wait to try all the exotic brews, buy antique turkish coffee pitchers, and go to all the local shops. Little did I know that Starbucks, Caribou Coffee, etc. have taken over. </div>
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Much to my disappointment, if the locals weren't in line for their caramel macchiatos, they were pouring hot water over plain ol' Lipton tea or instant Nestle Cafe. Not really the highest brow flavors or the trendiest. But it did get me thinking that sometimes the simple classics are just what the doctor ordered. I keep some Nestle Cafe on hand at all times now, in case I need caffeine in a pinch. Do you drink instant coffee? What about plain black tea?</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6719666521757500002.post-75555902455127206332015-03-27T14:36:00.000-04:002015-03-28T00:09:39.913-04:00Support Groups?Until recently the only support group I joined since becoming a mother was one called Dairy Queens and it was for breastfeeding only (and it's awesome by the way, in case you are wondering). A few days ago I joined another group for stay at home moms. Since we are moving back to the US soon I felt like I should get acquainted with what it's like to be a mom there and maybe even find some stay at home moms in the Tampa area that I could meet up with.<br />
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This was a bad idea. It's mostly just negative ranting. The admin rules say this is not allowed but if they deleted all the complaining posts then there wouldn't be a group left. If a question or comment is not ranting it's something like, "Let me see a picture of your cute baby!" or my favorite was a comment that spelled weigh as "way." I just can't.<br />
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But none of that was the catalyst for me leaving the group only days after joining. It was two links. Both read as bitter, negative, lonely, and defensive. I presume their (just kidding, they're) supposed to be funny by the many "likes" and supportive comments on the Facebook posts. The first article was ripping on the "<a href="http://www.scarymommy.com/dear-perfect-mom-in-the-facebook-comments/" target="_blank">Dear Perfect Mom in the Facebook Comments</a>" and the second was "<a href="http://mom.me/blog/18522-foreplay-moms/" target="_blank">What Foreplay for Moms Really Looks Like</a>." Both perpetuate stereotypes of what mothers are and frankly those stereotypes were a reason I didn't want to join the mom brigade to begin with. Sure we all have hard days but why can't a mother be happy, put together, and in love with her children and husband? And why can't she also enjoy being a stay at home mom and find peace with her life decisions? Why are people venting on the internet to total strangers instead of talking to their spouses and seeking advice from trustworthily loved ones?<br />
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The Perfect Mom article is so angry and so defensive that I can barely read through it. I have no further comments except that maybe the woman who wrote it should seek therapy.<br />
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Regarding the foreplay article, I disagree with it entirely. Here's a quote that sort of sums it up the article "While it used to be fun to fool around on the couch or make out at the movies, now that I'm a mom, I like an entirely different kind of foreplay." I'm the same woman I was a year ago. I have the same desires and passions. True I have been a bit distracted and completely immersed in my new life role but that doesn't mean that I also don't want my husband to flirt with me, take me out, bring me flowers or even that I don't want to fool around on the couch. I feel like the article is saying, I wish my husband would read my mind and help me out around the house or fix dinner now and then. But it comes off as passive aggressive and sarcastic. If by foreplay you mean intimacy and by intimacy you mean you wish your spouse and you communicated better and had more balanced responsibilities at home then why don't you talk to him about it? He's not a mind reader.<br />
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Oh and then after all that I read <a href="http://www.buzzfeed.com/jennaguillaume/boom-pregnant?bffb&utm_term=4ldqpgp#.omRB3q2Wr" target="_blank">this</a>. Enjoy, all you apparently undersexed moms out there. I guarantee it's better than a clean kitchen.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1